THIRD COUSIN

THIRD COUSIN

A One-Minute Play by Linnea Rose

ANGELA and DEREK are kissing in her dorm. ANGELA’S MOM calls her on her phone. She picks up. DEREK is wearing a captain’s lacrosse jersey. 
ANGELA
Hi Mom.
ANGELA’S MOM
Hi, hunny! Are you okay? You sound like you’re out of breath?
ANGELA
Oh that…I just got back from the gym.
ANGELA’S MOM
Oh fun! Your Auntie Kathy just called and was wondering if you had met your third cousin, DJ yet?
ANGELA
Nope. Not yet. What does he look like.
ANGELA’S MOM
Well he is (describes physicality of actor playing DEREK: hair, height, eyes, etc).
ANGELA
(Quickly stops to look at DEREK) Mom, there are a lot of guys who look like that here. Can you…can you be more specific?
ANGELA’S MOM
Are you sure you’re okay? You sound exhausted. Are you sleeping regularly?
ANGELA
I’m fine.
ANGELA’S MOM
Okay well, DJ plays some varsity sport. Football? No, that’s not it…Field Hockey?
ANGELA
(Detaches mouth from DEREK) Lacrosse?
ANGELA’S MOM
Yes! Lacrosse, that’s the one.
ANGELA
(Gulps and looks down at the letter C on his jersey.)What position does he play mom?
ANGELA’S MOM
Kathy said he was the leader or something.
ANGELA
The captain?
ANGELA’S MOM
Yes! That’s it. He is the captain of the lacrosse team.
ANGELA
(Gulps.) Mom, I’m going to have to call you back.
ANGELA’S MOM
Alright. Bye hunny, I lo-
(ANGELA hangs up phone)
ANGELA
Your nickname wouldn’t be DJ, would it?
DEREK
Derek James. “DJ”.
ANGELA
Oh my god! (Drops phone. DEREK still attempts to seduce her.)
Black out.
END OF PLAY

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